Info & Advice

Understanding Your Parents

For many children, their parents are their main caregivers, although there are also children who have relatives like grandparents or aunts and uncles as their main caregivers.  Parents are usually the ones who support the family. In most families, at least one parent works to support the family, while the other parent stays at home to look after the children. It is also common to have both parents working.

Parents Have Problems Too

Sometimes, parents have problems too. Just like how you may feel stressed about homework or a friendship problem, parents may be stressed about work, money, grandparents (their parents), health or you, their children! Indeed, being a parent can be stressful because they have so many responsibilities!

When Parents Argue

When parents argue, they may shout loudly and use harsh words. They may also do things like slam the table or the door and look really angry.

Seeing or hearing your parents argue can be frightening. When your parents argue, you may feel scared, worried that someone may get hurt, worried that your parents do not love each other anymore or worried that your parents may be angry with you too.  

When One Parent Hits the Other

There may be times during an argument when one parent hits the other. When this happens, you may feel scared or you may want to protect one of your parents from being hurt. So, always remember not to go in between your parents when they are physically fighting!

What You Can Do if Your Parents Argue or Fight?

Sometimes, parents forget that their arguing or fighting makes the children frightened because they are upset.

What can you do?

  1. Keep yourself safe
  2. Go somewhere in the house away from your parents
  3. Do something distracting

Once your parents are aware that their arguing upsets you, they may explain to you the reasons they are arguing or take steps to avoid arguing in front of you.

Remember that all parents argue at times and it is perfectly normal for parents to argue. Usually they will calm down after the argument and make up with each other.

However, if your parents argue or fight often, things may be more serious. If you or a family member often get hurt during a fight, it is important to let someone else know about what is happening at home. If possible, speak to someone whom you trust, like a close relative, your teacher, school counsellor, or you can call Tinkle Friend to share. Your parents may have their own problems and need help as well. So by talking to someone, you can also get help for them and make things better at home.

Sometimes, children wonder if it their fault that their parents argue or fight. Remember that it is not your fault if your parents fight. Arguments or fights between your parents happen because they disagree with each other and this is something that they have to work out.

If there is something that is troubling you at home, remember that you can call Tinkle Friend to talk about it. You can also call Tinkle Friend to share about how you are feeling, or about your problems with school, friends or with anything else that is troubling you.